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Here are some simple approach to  overcome low Self-Esteem, also called Them-esteem.

March 13, 2023 by dr.dan Anxiety and Stress, Miscellaneous 0 comments

The word esteem comes from latin, mean Estimate, allowing others to estimate your value. So, in my opinion, there is no LOW self-esteem, but more about them esteem. By giving the power to others to give you some value, you stripe away yourself the power you have been given and let others decide your fate. By deciding the latter, you no longer can elevate your values and accomplishments because there is no longer anything left to esteem yourself.

Do not think you are the ONLY victim feeling or experiencing the same similar treatment, but it is a very common issue share by billion of humans on Earth. Self-esteem, or LOW self esteem as most would call it is primarily based on past traumatic experiences that allowed changes in how you perceive yourself short and long term. Regardless of what you have accomplished in the past, you solely focus on the present value others have given you, and they are mostly toxic values.

You can’t allow anyone or anything to let your self-esteem take a beating just because you esteem them higher than how they esteem you. This article is to provide you with the tools you need to change your internal perspective, to focus more on how you look at yourself and the value you give TO yourself, without any external evaluation from others upon you. Always remember that others will project their own insecurities on you, just because you became a threat to their own esteem and they are too anxious to deal with these challenges on their own.

As we are all aware of the different types of personalities we experience daily, some may say that introverted personalities are dealing with low self esteem compared to extrovert, or Type A personalities. Extroverted personalities can also have an esteem imbalance, while the introvert can feel extremely satisfied with their lives and accomplishments.

Let’s get more into the ways you can manage some esteem imbalances. There is NO such things as low self esteem, but more on how you can balance the power you give to others to make you feel better, happier and more fulfilled.

1. Quit faking in order to impress others.

It’s important to remember that your self-esteem comes from within, and it cannot be boosted by pretending to please other people. In fact, constantly pretending to please others can do more harm than good in the long run.

It’s understandable to want to make others happy and feel accepted, but when you prioritize their needs and desires over your own, you’re not being true to yourself. This can create a sense of inner conflict and leave you feeling unfulfilled and disconnected from your own wants and needs.

Furthermore, it’s impossible to please everyone. We all have different expectations, needs, and desires, and trying to meet them all is an impossible task. This can lead to a sense of disappointment and failure, which can further damage your self-esteem.

2. Develop the ability to say “NO” to others. They will respect you more.

Saying “no” can be difficult, especially when we want to help others and make them happy. However, it’s important to remember that it’s okay to say “no” when something doesn’t feel right, or when you’re unable to take on additional responsibilities or tasks.

Saying “no” doesn’t mean you’re selfish or uncaring. In fact, it’s a sign of healthy boundaries and self-respect. It’s a way of communicating your needs and priorities, and setting clear limits on what you’re willing and able to do.

By saying “no” to others, you’re also saying “yes” to yourself. You’re making time and space for your own needs, goals, and aspirations. You’re acknowledging your own worth and value, and showing yourself the respect and kindness you deserve.

3. Let yourself to make errors and perceive them as opportunities for progress.

Making mistakes can be difficult and even painful at times, but it’s important to remember that they also offer an opportunity for growth and learning.

When we make mistakes, we’re forced to confront our shortcomings and weaknesses, and to identify areas where we can improve. This is an essential part of personal growth and self-improvement.

Mistakes provide us with a valuable opportunity to learn from our experiences, to gain new insights and perspectives, and to develop resilience and determination in the face of challenges.

Remember, making mistakes is not a sign of failure or weakness. It’s a natural part of the learning process, and it’s through our mistakes that we gain the wisdom and understanding we need to become better, stronger, and more capable individuals.

4. Accept accountability for your actions.

Taking responsibility for your actions is a sign of maturity and personal growth. It’s not always easy to admit when we’ve made a mistake or hurt someone else, but it’s an essential part of being a responsible and accountable person.

When you take responsibility for your actions, you’re showing integrity and character. You’re owning up to your mistakes, learning from them, and doing what you can to make things right. This is a powerful way to build trust and respect with others, and to cultivate a sense of self-respect and self-worth within yourself.

Remember, you are in control of your own choices and actions. No one can make you do something that goes against your values or beliefs. By taking responsibility for your actions, you’re acknowledging that you have the power to make a difference in your own life and the lives of those around you.

5. Always offer a lending hand.

Helping others in need is one of the most fulfilling and rewarding experiences you can have in life. By offering your assistance, you have the power to make a real difference in someone’s life, and to contribute to a brighter and more compassionate world.

Whether it’s lending a listening ear, offering a helping hand, or simply being there for someone who needs support, your willingness to help can have a profound impact on others. You never know how much your kindness and compassion can mean to someone who is struggling, and your willingness to help can inspire them to keep pushing forward, no matter what challenges they may face.

Remember, helping others doesn’t just benefit those you assist, it also enriches your own life in countless ways. It builds empathy, compassion, and understanding, and it creates a sense of connection and community that is essential for our well-being and happiness.

6. Be completely immersed in whatever you chose to accomplish. Stop stressing about your choices.

It’s completely normal to feel stressed about the choices you make in life. After all, our choices have a significant impact on our future and the path we take. However, it’s important to remember that every decision we make – good or bad – is an opportunity for growth and learning.

So don’t be too hard on yourself if you feel like you’ve made a mistake or if you’re unsure about which direction to take. Trust that you have the strength and resilience to navigate through any challenges that come your way.

Remember, every successful person has faced obstacles and setbacks along the way. It’s how you respond to those challenges that truly matters. So stay focused, keep moving forward, and believe in yourself.

You have the power to create the life you want, and every choice you make is a step in the right direction. So keep pushing yourself, stay positive, and never give up on your dreams. You’ve got this!

#loveforyourself self-acceptance self-awareness self-esteem self-worth

dr.dan
Cognitive Behavior psychotherapist, NeuroLinguistic Programming expert and Life, Business Retirement coach, but also provide marital/relationship coaching, depression and anxiety, anger management and so much more. We have individual and group session available. Author, Entrepreneur, Podcaster all wrapped into one individual.
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